10th Jan 2008

Mother: Pinky, what are you doing in the kitchen?

Pinky: I am helping Sanya.

Mother: And what is Sanya doing in the kitchen?

Pinky: She is eating up the sweets made for the guests.

 

Ritesh: My dad has George Washington's watch.

Sumesh: That's nothing. My dad has Adam's apple.

 

Once upon a time, a mother advised her foolish son to follow the path of his late father and climb the ladder of glory.

From the very next day onwards, the boy started climbing up the nearby water-tank for about then times a day. Fed up with her son's foolish act, the mother finally asked him the reason as to why he kept climbing up the water-tank. To this the boy replied that he was just practicing to learn the art of climbing up a ladder of glory of the high water-tank.

 

Mohan: Did you like the parrot I sent you?

Sohan: Yes. It was very delicious.

Mohan: Very delicious? What do you mean? You ate it up! I paid $12 for it and it spoke in six different languages.l

Sohan: Then why did it not speak when I put it in the oven?

 

Rajan: I feel sick as a dog.

Mohan: Don't worry, I will call the vet.

 

Son: Dad, when my results are out, what will u give me?

Father: A bicycle if you pass, and an auto rickshaw if you fail.

 

Richard: It is very hot. I hate summer.

Johnson: I don't agree with you. Do you know in some places water change into ice?

Richard: Where?

Johnson: In the fridge.

 

Mother: Is my son outstanding in the class?

Teacher: Yes, he always stands out of the class.

 

Teacher: You know the law of gravitation explains how we manage to stay on the ground.

Shilpa: Yes, but how did people stay on the ground before the law was invented.

 

Kishore: I bet you, I can make you say 'black'.

Rajesh: Go on then.

Kishore: What colour is Australian Cricket Team's Colour?

Rajesh: …Yellow

Kishore: Wat colour is sky?

Rajesh: Blue

Kishore: There you are! I told you that I could make you say 'blue'.

Rajesh: No, you said you could make me say 'black'.

Kishore: Okay! Now there you are! And you have just said 'black'. Haven't you?

 

Teacher: Balaram, show me Holland on this globe. (Suddenly the globe falls down from the table at the teacher's feet).

Balaram: Ma'am, Holland is at your feet.

 

One day two friends, Carlos and Nikolai were returning home from school. They both were passing by a lake.

Carlos: Nikolai, do you know swimming?

Nikolai: No.

Carlos: With so much water around, why can't you swim?

Nikolai: With so much air around, why can't you fly?

 

A boy is writing a letter to his mother from the hostel.

"This hostel is so good that they make me take a bath only once a month."

 

Father: I just could not understand how my bicycle was stolen when it was locked.

Son: On, dad! Was it your bicycle? I thought it to be of someone else's so, I helped the thieves to break open the lock.

 

Tim: Arun, my cat can tell its name.

Arun: Cool! What is your cat's name?

Tim: Meow…

 

Beggar: Sahib, I have not tasted food for a week.

Passerby: Don't worry. It still tastes the same.

 

A boy was caught stealing a watch from a shop. He was put in the lock-up. A criminal asked him, "Why are you after these small things. Why don't you go for big items like say, looting a bank?"

Boy: I can't do that because by the time school gets over, all the banks are closed.

 

Teacher: I asked you to draw a ring and not a square.

Student: This square is boxing ring, Miss.

 

A beggar used to stand outside a hotel and sing non-stop. This irritated the customers and they stopped coming to the hotel. Seeing this, the manager one day approached the beggar and offered him a sum of $10 and told him not to stand near the hotel.

The beggar refused to take the money saying, "The manager of the nearby hotel gave me $20 for this purpose. You must also give me the same amount.